abbymackers

Against the grain

As individuals we have purpose, a focus, some driving force that pushes us out of bed in the morning and encourages us to fulfil mundane tasks in order to reap the benefits of the grand scheme. It may be a trivial focus, a necessity that must be addressed. It may be something more grand, a neurosurgeon looking to better the world of medicine. Whatever it is, our purpose keeps us and guides like a kind parent, all the way through life. It endures and tolerates all of life’s travesties, doesn’t take offence to being forgotten, simply waits patiently and reminds cautiously. These are the purposes that make a successful life and the rewards worth gleaning.

My journey is rewarding. Daily I am influenced and reminded of the joy life brings when you take time to enjoy it. I am encouraged by the feelings of presence and grounding I receive as I take each step bravely but I am lacking purpose as I allow myself to be consumed by life. Unimportant trivialities are becoming all consuming necessities, priorities are becoming wish lists. In my quest for wholeness, I have stepped away from the focus of what really matters. Myself.

I am thankful for my journey to allow me to recognise that. I can acknowledge how much easier it would be to revert to a former self, someone so easily distracted and disillusioned with life. To not have to concentrate and force myself to prioritise. To enable the traits so inherently wrong to guide me into numbness. Life continues around us, regardless of circumstance or feelings, I must challenge and motivate myself to stand up to my surroundings and go against the grain in search of my purpose, the brand new me.

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This entry was published on March 27, 2014 at 11:14 pm. It’s filed under Life, mental health, well being and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.

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